“God IS Love. Love is who we are, and living a loving life is really all that matters.”
Margaret. I was introduced to her when I was “eleven-going-on-twelve.” We were the same age. She knew me when I didn’t even know myself. She became my teacher, best friend, and the precocious twin I never had. Not bad for a powerful character in Judy Blume’s pre-teen book, Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. It was released the year I was born. The year she was born to the world, 1970. Margaret and I had much in common: prepubescent boys, bras, blonde hair, and Ms. Beezly (oops, I mean “menstroo-ation”). We both had moved to a small town, attended different schools, and adjusted to a whole new group of friends. Our main bond? Two sixth grade girls without a religious affiliation. Margaret’s mother was Christian. Mine was a former Jehovah Witness who had thrown away her dedication after her first marriage ended in divorce. Margaret’s father was Jewish. Mine was an eccentric Irish Catholic who had also let go of his faith...just because. Four noncommittal parents who left the big decision for us to choose (if at all) when we grew up. It was about the only thing my parents let go of. And now, I know why.
Are You There God? It’s Me, Kathleen.
Do you think Ted West will ask for me to “go with him?” He is such a babe, and I would like him to take me to the dance. I promise I will help my mom with the dishes. Thank you, God.
No answer. And yet, I would often receive a calming sensation take over my body as I said it. Margaret’s prayer became my old standby. Even when I was thirty. Especially when dealing with eye cancer, a son with developmental issues, and a complicated marital situation. When I was thirty-seven, my heart knew that religion-any religion-was not my personal path to peace. God knows I tried, hard. I am now in my early forties and know differently; my wish is to tell Margaret my secret. We had forgotten to be here, now. We had forgotten to hear our whisper while breathing deep into the power of our heart and trusting the present moment. This is when we will know what love really is as long as we are truly hearing. We can listen all we want; and it is when we hear, that we tap into our knowing. Margaret and I were too busy looking up to the sky and asking with doubt, trepidation, and fear: Are You There, God? ARE YOU THERE? All the while, God was patiently waiting for us to remember that love is always HERE to claim. For us to remember that what we have been looking for all our life has been with us all along.
Are You HERE Kathleen? It’s Me, God.
It’s me, the Creator that is always with you. Stay with me in this moment, for there is no other moment. Stay with me in every breath that you take. Stay with me in your finest and darkest hour. You are an instrument of my love. We are one. You are remembering. You are beginning to hear. Because of your willingness, I have provided you with the perfect teacher, Cinnamon H. Lofton. By using her as a mirror to your heart, you can use your life as an example and spread my message of love. Or not. And, you are up for the task of being a messenger of love.
Are You There Margaret? It’s Me, Kathleen.
Thank you for being the best twin a girl could have. It is timely for me to adopt a new way. Your prayer was my path to peace; a perfect road, now leading me to a new one, the one less traveled. Thank you Margaret for showing me the way. I will always be grateful for you and remember that we are one.
Forever and even then,
Kathleen
